An African proverb says, “It takes a village to raise a child.”
I say, “Please be my village.”
Until now I am not sure whether I am considered a “millennial” or not. Not that it’s a good or bad thing. There are just a lot of things that people associate with whatever generation one is from. It may be true. It may be not.
But what I am sure of is this — I grew up in a generation where and when PEOPLE CARED. More.
… I played out in the streets and it was not scary nor dangerous. It doesn’t matter if it’s 2 PM or 2 AM. It was safe, period.
… I came home to an empty house on a rainy day and our neighbor fetched me with an umbrella and let me stay in their house until my parents got home.
… I fought with my friend and her mom gave me a piece of her mind, or in some cases, told on me to my parents so they can give me an earful, or in some cases, a swing of their slippers or hanger (if you get what I mean haha. And yes, leave the spanking to the parents. :P).
… I was disorderly in school and my teacher reprimanded me, or even let me stand in the corner if I did wrong (not that I was a bad girl haha, things just happen).
… I raised my voice at them who deserved respect and I sure got what I deserved.
And many more encounters and lessons that made me who I am now. A person whom I can say, in a way, I am proud of.
And sometimes I wish my daughter, or us parents, can still have that kind of support system nowadays.
As a parent, I am not spared from sepanx. And even though my little girl’s already six, I still experience it daily. There a lot of things, uncertainties, out there that are just outside my visibility (haha what a term), let alone control. I can only pray. Pray. PRAY. (Pray more than 3 times a day. ALL DAY.)
But you know what? It will bring such relief if I knew I have a village who’s got my back.
So yes please! Help me raise my child.
We don’t need each other’s judgment. We don’t need each other’s side glances or rolling eyes. We don’t need us belittling the kind of mother or father the other is.
BUT WE NEED TO CARE.
A genuine care that transcends all social barriers around parenting misnomers and prejudice. A genuine care that normalizes different parenting styles and standards, based on a consensus of what’s right and wrong. A genuine concern for the welfare (character, health, safety, etc) of my child and yours that pushes you to step up. To step in.
If you think my child is in danger, step in. PROTECT.
If you think my child is doing something wrong, step in. CORRECT.
If you think my child can do better, step in. ENCOURAGE.
If you think my child is doing something right, by all means, still step in. PRAISE.
Treat my child as you would your own — with love and concern, and I can do the same for yours, if you let me.
Let’s start breaking down walls and work together for a better community of parents and children. As how it used to be back then. As how it is supposed to be now.
It takes two to tango. But it takes a village to raise a child. A good child.
“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”
~ Proverbs 22:6
No wait… There’s more! 😂
We recently launched Parenting Rock, a community of parents who dream of a world with more kids having a sense of purpose and direction; with lives, character, and values built in love, correction, and discipline. Please join us as we share our personal stories, lessons and experiences as we start building a village for our children and their future.